How can I help myself?
HEALTHY AND UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
This is a caring relationship:
- Being good friends
- Freedom to do your own thing
- Time and space to see your friends
- Having your own interests
- Knowing your opinions are respected
- Listening to each other
- Having fun together
- Trusting each other
- Being able to disagree with each other
- Being able to go at your own pace - including sexuality
- Making decisions together
- Being able to talk about it when you have an argument
- Feeling safe
- Respecting the decisions if either of you want to end the relationship
This is not a caring relationship:
- Your boyfriend/girlfriend gets angry when you talk to someone else.
- Your boyfriend/girlfriend is verbally aggressive or physically threatening.
- Your boyfriend/girlfriend calls you names, puts you down, and makes you feel bad.
- Your boyfriend/girlfriend uses force, threats, emotional blackmail, or bargains to make you do things you don’t want to do.
- Your boyfriend/girlfriend threatens to harm any of your family, friend, pets or property.
- Your boyfriend/girlfriend posts unpleasant or intimately revealing things about you on the internet.
If any of these things are happening to you, you may be in an abusive relationship.
Relationship abuse is not a one off event. It is a cycle and usually gets worse if nothing is done to stop it.
It is not your fault - abusers are responsible for their behaviour. If you are in an abusive relationship the best thing you can do is to end it. This may be tough and you may need help.
- Find support from the people who care about you
- Contact one of the support agencies listed below
- Go out in groups (not alone) for a while
- Carry a mobile phone or phone card and phone numbers of people or organisations who can offer support
- Carry money
- Make sure you can always get home safely
- Speak to an adult you trust or one of the organisations below for support.
Where to go for help?
If you are in immediate danger call the police on 999
Centre 33 - a free, confidential service offering young people information and support on any issue.
Centre 33, 33 Clarendon Street , Cambridge CB1 1JX Tel: 01223 316448 Open Monday and Tuesday 10 am – 5 pm, Wednesday 12-5 pm Friday & Saturday 10 am – 1.30 pm
Disrespect Nobody - provides information and advice on what healthy and unhealthy relationships are.
The Hideout - a website created by Women's Aid to help children and young people to understand domestic abuse, and how to take positive action if it's happening to you.
Love Respect - a website created by Women's Aid to provide information and advice on healthy and unhealthy relationships.
Fearless - provides support and a way of reporting issues such as violence, cybercrime and sexual assault/abuse.
The Kite Trust - a service providing information and support for LGBT+ people in Cambridgeshire under the age of 25.
Childline - Helpline 0800 11 11. Councillors can talk to you about any problem if you are 18 or younger.
Cambridge Rape Crisis - Sexual violence helpline for women and men 01223 245888.
The Mix - A young people's website which includes information and support on healthy relationships.
Embrace - Provides support for children and young people who have been a victim of crime (including violence and abuse).